iPad is like a BMW 7 Series: fat and excessive

A year ago or so I had a week with a friend's big, fat BMW. It was actually a 645i not a 7 series, but same point: I found it so fat and luxurious I actually felt nauseous when sitting down in the thing each the morning. I'm not trying to pull a Cayce Pollard here. I'm not thinking I've got some preternatural sensitivity. I really did find the steering wheel so meaty in my hands--which are not small themselves--and the sensation of being trapped inside the bathtub like interior of that car so constricting that it brought back childhood memories of delirium, when I had a fever of 104F and the world felt like the inside of a Dali painting. Also, there's such excess in a high end BMW, a level of perfection so far above where normal mortals live. Every stitch is in place. The leather is thick and heavy with wealth. All the switches click with a sublime feel that makes me think only of large quantities of delicious butter and steak and the morning after feeling of way too much expensive red wine. Nauseousness.

This afternoon I spent my first 15 minutes with an iPad and felt exactly the same way.

If you know me, you know I love technology. I just purchased a LiveScribe pen for example and am tickled with it. I have a BlackBerry filled with way too many apps. I use Twitter. I have to have the latest software version and am always trying new stuff. I buy almost all my books in electronic format. But I was surprised at how completely unsuited I am for the iPad. Here's why:

1. I do love keyboards. I love that tactile give of the keys. Hitting the glass of a virtual keyboard for even a short length of time makes my fingertips hurt.

2. The iPad is heavy. Really heavy. Let me say that more strongly: it feels like a brick, like you could use it in an exercise routine. My Kindle and the iPod touch in contrast are magically light, almost weightless. Holding the iPad made me feel again like I was in a childhood delirium.

3. I don't play games. My laptop is fine for the occasional movie. So all that functionality is wasted on me.

4. I find Flipboard frightening. That's the app that pulls content from everywhere and creates your own magazine. I am not a strong person. I am too easily seduced. Flipboard feels like being trapped in a doctor's office with an infinite number of the latest magazines and no appointment in sight. Get me out of here! But no, even though the door is unlocked I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE!

It makes sense that the iPad is devouring netbooks and consumer level cheap notebooks. It's the same price and incomparably more beautiful. It's like a taste of BMW for the price of a used Honda Super Cub. But the only use I've got for it is to show someone a presentation across the conference room table. For the most part, as Cory Doctorow says, it's just a consumption device.

Lotus Evora

An example of why the Brits do the best car reviews.

Gorgeous Honda Super Cub

Gorgeous Honda Super Cub at night on the streets of San Francisco. Among the very top designs of all time (perhaps along with the BlackBerry 7200 series!).

2009 Prius Spy Photos!

More here from AutoBlog: LINK

Three Across Matra Murena

Rootes-Chrsler.co.uk

Jalopnik (LINK) pointed me to one of my strange childhood car fantasies, the Matra Simca Bagheera. It was cool because it was a two door sports sedan with three across seating! Funny the things boys will obsess about.

Jalopnik noted (LINK) that the successor to the Bagheera, the Murena for sale on eBay (LINK) . . . ok, enough, back to work.

New Porsche Targa is too beautiful for words

GermanCarScene (LINK) via Straightline (LINK)

Oh, to live in Europe for the cars. Don't even need to drive them.

via Straightline (LINK)

Cars really are the most significant pieces of art that the average of us every buys. Just look as this wonderful little Alfa Romeo. (Turn off your computer speakers--the soundtrack spoils it.) Too cute name though: Mi.to. So cute it even has it's own blog, of sorts (LINK).

The brilliant Honda diesel I want

Honda is supposed to be introducing their 2.2 liter diesel in 2009, in the Acura TSX of all cars, 50 states legal and without the urea injection system (yes, you heard that right) that cars like Mercedes will require to meet emissions standards. But in Europe you've been able to buy that engine for a while, in a brilliant Honda Civic, unlike any Honda Civic we get here in the United States. Of all the cars in the world I could have, this would be right there at the top of the list.

Looks like a Renault!

There's an amusing take on the car, from last year's Jalopnik (LINK), as well as an article on hypermiling this car and the massive Audi Q7 diesel in which they got 70mpg in the Honda and 35mpg in the Audi. Their point: all the bellyaching from US manufacturers (including Toyota but notably not Honda) that they don't have the technology to get such mileage is complete and utter bs (LINK).

I love the look of an old Miata with the headlights up

Piaggio in New York city

Here's a test from Autoblog Green of the three wheeled Piaggio motorbike that I noticed was all over Paris when I visited a few weeks back. LINK

Nissan Versa vs. Renault Scenic

After driving the Renault Scenic in France, I wrote about how "wowed" I was by its design, handling, fuel economy. There are no cars in the U.S. that come close in terms of performance because none (yet) have such a wonderful diesel engine.

But in terms of design, there's no reason there couldn't be a comparable car in the U.S. Unfortunately, we're lacking in that respect too. The closest we come is the Nissan Versa, a cousin of the Scenic since Renault owns Nissan. The Versa is, reputedly, built on the same or a similar platform. Indeed, the two cars have very similar. The Scenic is one inch (27mm) shorter but is both three inches (86mm) longer in its wheelbase and greater in its height. It's definitely wider but unfortunately, I don't have width stats because all I can find is a measurement for the Scenic "avec rétros extérieurs", that is with mirrors.

I sat in a Versa recently and it's amazing the difference that design can make. The small additions in wheelbase, height and width, combined with designers who are in a completely different league, make the Scenic feel like a car that's one whole size class up. You sit more vertical in the Scenic, there's much more legroom front and back, the seatbacks are thinner but more comfortable, the driving position is better, the luggage compartment is flat to the floor instead of featuring a huge lip above the bumper, there are storage pockets galore including four deep covered wells in the floor, one at each outboard seating position, there's greater visibility for front and rear passengers, etc etc. And the fit and finish is also one or more classes up.

Oh well. I do love New England. Its rural character can equal rural France in many respects. And although we don't know how to make croissants, at least our food is starting to be comparable. But we're a decade back in car design, at least for small, efficient cars.

Cars in Paris 3

This is the boot of the Renault Megane. A good match-up for the so-called "Bangle butt" from BMW but really much more striking. This design grew on me. I'd buy one with a 2.0 diesel if I lived in France. On my other blog I have a longer post about the Renault Scenic we drove for several days--great car (LINK).

A nice old Mini and a new Smart. Just goes to show that the Smart isn't really all that small. And the Mini can seat 5 versus the Smart's 2. Shows what a great design the Mini was, so many years ago.

Cars in Paris 2

You can buy this Lotus in the United States but I've never seen such a speed racer version.

Who cars that this Porsche gets only about 12mpg??!!

There are a lot of these 3 wheeled bikes around Paris.

Cars in Paris

I love this two door Peugeot with sliding doors. Sort of like a coupe minivan.

There are some STRANGE names chosen for European cars.
Update: it's a perfume brand: LINK

That's stretching the limit on the definition of "motorcycle". Can fit 2 people side-by-side but not Americans--they have to be thin like the French.

There's a wonderful new version of the old Fiat 500 out. Saw several but forgot to snag a picture. Here's the original.